Join MetaWaddleDee and I as we discuss Squidward's job at the Krusty Krab, the EB Games Trade-in policy, MW3 ("OH MY GOD THIS IS SO INCREDIBLE!!"), and Forge maps.
FH: Tell us a little bit about yourself guy.
I'm an 18 year old male, single, from Minnesota. I enjoy the arts, and I just started to go to Art Institutes International Minnesota for College. I work at a gas station.
FH: Behind the counter?
I'm a cashier, yes.
This is going to sound strange, but i've always kind of wanted to be a cashier at a gas station. Do you work nights day or both?
I just work days, and you dont want to be a cashier, or maybe, you just dont want to be a cashier in a bad neighborhood. I've got some horror stories I can share.
FH: Preferably one without a stabbing or a woman giving birth.
So this old guy walks into the gas station on his phone and says,
"I don't know! What do I look like, a problem solver?! Just get an abortion and stop bothering me about it!"
"Can I get $20 in gas and Marlboro lights"
"Alright, paying with a card?"
"Here you go"
"I'm sorry, I dont think we take American Express yet, were in progress signing with American Express to accept their cards here"
"WHAT THE FUCK!!! EVERYONE TAKES AMERICAN EXPRESS!!!"
"I dont know what to tell you...sorry"
"FUCKIN' BULLSHIT!!!"
and his 4 year old daughter was right at his side the entire time...
"Swisher Sweet maaaaan"
"Do you have your I.D.?"
"Naw maaaan, its in my car, but they always let me buy without it."
"Well, I need to see your I.D."
"Do you want me to go get it? You can trust me maaaan."
"I need to see your I.D."
"Alright, I'll go grab it"
He never came back...
Have you ever had to bask in the stench of a 10 year old Grease trap for Four hours? Well, if anyone gives you the opportunity to do so, do not accept their offer.
I hand an old lady her change, and shes old, like maybe 50 or 60, and as I hand her the change one of the coins sticks to my finger and I said "Oops, that to my finger!" she replid, without hesitation "that's what he said!"
A guy masturbated there once.
- The end.
FH: Wow. So uh-- you made an Invasion map! How 'bout that?
Yes! I did! I spent about a month or two making a version of a map that I was okay with, but not too proud of. Then the map got a fantastic review from Organite, and I played the map with Nondual and Kuroda and realized that I could greatly and easily improve the map that people already liked. I then spent another eh... two or three months just tweaking the map and I kept getting this lingering feeling like the map could be so much better but something was just holding it back.
Then I realized the problem wasnt with the map but the gametype, so I switched the attackers and defenders, and it just clicked, the map got a steady flow to it, the loadouts were balanced how I wanted them and the game just worked better. So I kept tweaking the elites attacking and the map has grown into what it is today.
FH: I remember playing the map either during testing or in a TGIF just as it came out, and I thought one of the strongest selling points was that it had recognisable and seemless architecture, where a lot of Invasion maps either have the the gameplay balance, but the locations aren't fetching, or the objective looks interesting, but there's no balancing.
Was there anything you wanted to do with the map, but couldn't due to constraints?
I wish I had more rocks. If I had more rocks I could do it all: I could add more unique cover to phase three, I could make the ramp into phase two smoother, I could improve the cover in phase one and two, and I could get rid of all the ing seastacks. seastacks.
FH: When they announced Invasion they marketed it kind of like they were bringing campaign to multiplayer, and I had hoped there'd be more of a blockbuster feel to it, like taking down a Scarab before it reaches a certain point on the map, and more "real world" objectives similar to that.
When Halo 4 comes out (and if it include Invasion mode), is there any particular feature, addition or objective type you're hoping they'll add? Besides more rocks of course.
Changing the health of vehicles would be a godsend, then you would be able to make power vehicles like the Scorpion and the Banshee more fine-tuned to the map you're creating, rather than making the map to support each vehicle.
FH: It's been a pretty dry period for big release games, and you could argue that it ends in 10 days with Gears 3. Is it something you plan on getting?
I like Gears, but I only think I'll get it when the price drops from all of the trade-ins, because all I care about is the campaign, the multiplayer is something I wont get invested into because of school and various other things.
FH: I'm not very interested in the multiplayer, but I don't want to hear someone describe to me how the trilogy ends. I'll probably beat the campaign as quick as I can then get store credit for it.
I'm just stoked for the update.
FH: The Reach Title Update?
Yeah, Bloom and armor lock are the two things (IMO) that hold reach back from being the game that it should be. But with the option to toggle bloom I'll still keep it on Summit.
FH: I hope the things Halo 4 takes from Reach is minimal. I want vehicle maps again like Valhalla and Avalanche. Not to mention a map like The Pit just doesn't work in Reach.
I love the aspects reach brought us, but I don't like how stapled down they are. Like I want to make the jet pack only go half as high, and I want Evade to only be used once before a recharge. I just think if we had more control over the AA's everyone would love them, but as they are now, they only work to improve big-team games and Invasion.
And the Pit. I loved it in Halo 3, but I'm sick of everyone complaining about how the "classics" just don't work in reach. Good, go and make a classic, that involves all of the good things in reach.
FH: I get what you mean about "Stapled down" I think armour abilities would be great if they had a set charge that never regenerates, or just very slowly.
I think if another item in the map recharged your abilities, then maps would have a completely different flow to them about where you can armor lock and where the advantages on the map are.
FH: Like a recharge pack next to the Health pack that regenerates AA's?
Sorta, but I was thinking more of a king of the hill area
FH: Did you see any of the COD XP footage over the last few days, or is MW not your thing?
I love Modern Warfare, but I think it'll be so much more fun to sit down and go, "OH MY GOD THIS IS SO INCREDIBLE!!" Rather than watching a video watching someone else go through that feeling. I did the same with Reach, or...tried to.
FH: I'd love to go in blind but there has been so little coming out recently and there's not much else to do. Are you excited for any of the shows making season returns soon?
I dont spend much time watching T.V. anymore... most of my time viewing is on Netflix. Currently I'm watching Jersey Shore. And man Snookie is a [very bad expletive].
FH: No foolin'?
So Grif asks "Who are you and how did you get into my house?"
Not the best question..
I've only watched four episodes...
FH: If you could ask the next guest a question, what would it be?
Pauly D, Ronnie, The Situation, or Vinny?
Who would you pick Transhuman?
FH: Not the butt.
I mean, wait what?
What, you don't like Vinny? Everyone loves Vinny!
FH: I'll have to ask Sharpshooter to explain what you just said to me next time I see him.
Any shout-outs, final goodbyes?
No, I'm tired and I'm not sure if anyone will even read this far.
FH: Yeah, I zoned out when you said 'Jersey'.
It's a shame that instead of ending on a high note, we ended on a creepy and confusing note. But that's life, sometimes everything seems like it's going your way and it's effortless and fun, and then sometimes "something like this".
VH1's "Ton of Cash" - The Greek Mystique's Final Animal - YouTube
As usual, drop me a line if you think of someone who you think would make an interesting interviewee, and why. Give me a tip guys. Just to see how it feels.
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